Joy

The light danced across the tablecloth. Tiny animations paired with humorous sound effects had the room erupting with laughter as I glanced at other tables to see faces filled with curiosity and joy. I took a sip of my virgin pina colada, careful not to disturb the orange slice that had been festively placed on the glass rim.

It was our sixth wedding anniversary, and we had chosen a unique experience to celebrate. I smiled at my husband from across the table, wondering if he was amused at this little show. As each course was presented in front of us, the concern I had about the quality of food for the sizable price tag diminished, and I relaxed into the booth. After all, we only treat ourselves to a dinner this extravagant once a year.

While the show and dishes were set to be the stars of the evening, we both found ourselves captivated by something else. For every silly antic that took place across our plates, we laughed louder at what was taking place nearby, barely containing ourselves so as to not disrupt the other diners.

It was the two women in the booth behind us having the time of their lives.

Every animation, each dish that was served, and a visit from the chef had them absolutely, and unequivocally, filled with joy.

They were also hilarious.

Listening to them was the highlight of our evening. Their reactions to everything that took place were filled with awe. At one point, tears began to stream from Husband’s eyes, as though his laughter needed to escape one way or another. We were quite sure they weren’t aware of the impact they were having on our evening, as it seemed like they were in their own wonderful, magical, joy-inducing universe. 

We were experiencing the same show as them, yet whereas I found it to be amusing, they were absolutely elated. We delighted in them so much that at the end of the evening I had to let them know their presence had the most wonderful impact on our evening. To our amusement we learned the pair were an adult daughter and her mother, and it warmed our hearts that these two joyful personalities were family.

On the ride home Husband and I spoke about the food, wondering how we could recreate some of the dishes we both loved, but the conversation soon turned back to these two women. I realized what captivated me about them the most wasn’t how funny they both were, but rather their unbridled joy. I wanted to know how someone could have so much love in their heart that it flowed out into every moment of their life.

Could I be like that?

I started to ponder how I approach most situations. “Cautiously”, I said out loud. While I loved to laugh, there is also an underlying pessimism to me, one that I try to pass off as preparedness but is most undoubtedly rooted in anxiety. 

I contemplated what it would be like to always expect the best. To greet each moment with joy, and to assume everyone always has the best intentions. To not let the outliers in these situations dull your optimism. 

I want to approach life, each moment, like those women. I want to be so full of love that even the darkest days melt away, instead of sticking to me. 

As soon as we got home, I found myself researching personality traits. Could it be possible to retrain my mind to think like them, or is personality so innate that we are chained to who we are now? Could I begin to be absolutely enchanted with life, instead of quietly running an internal dialogue of everything that is seemingly wrong with it?

As I lay in bed that night, I wondered if those women had any idea of the impact they had on me. While they were simply enjoying their evening, their outrageous love for life had made a deep impression. My eyes got heavier as I quietly vowed to dismantle thirty-seven years of negative thinking and rebuild my views, brick by brick, with joy.

Come morning, I had a lot of work to do.